Compromise

This past Sunday was the Kettle Moraine Day Parade in Eagle, WI. Every years BJ's family travels the 45 minutes to spend the afternoon with family. For many of our extended family it is the only time they see each other, and with the parade, way too much good food and all the family it really is a fun time.

BJ and I haven't been home for the parade since before we got married (I think), and this year BJ's parents asked if Sophie and I would come.

My 1st thought was that with Sophie's schedule so messed up and the parade at noon it would be a hassle. We'd either have to go early and leave before most of the family actually showed up or we'd have to come up late after much of the family had already left. However after thinking about it and talking with BJ's parents I decided that some things are more important than naps.

I wasn't willing to pitch them all together, but depending on what time she woke up in the morning I would move her nap one way or the other so we could make it (Sophie almost never falls asleep in the car).

The day of the parade Sophie was up ridiculously early which meant she would need a morning nap, and I could push her afternoon nap back giving us a nice chunk of time for the parade and family.

So after an hour morning nap, and a quick conversation with daddy (truly the most important thing each day) we were off to Eagle.

Sophie had a great time. Our little social butterfly "talked" to almost everyone, sat on Grandpa's lap for most of the parade, blew kisses, ate a ton of fruit (which she calls bellas), and tried to follow some of the bigger kids around. Though I didn't get talk to as many people as I'd like, and the conversations I had were quick with one eye on Sophie all the time, I had a really nice time and enjoyed watching Sophie meet more of her family.

We have a big family, especially on BJ's side they are a close knit group and I want Sophie to be knit tightly into this clan. I want her to know that she belongs, these are her people, part of her heritage, history and future. Sophie is not just part of our family (BJ and I) but part of OUR family (the lot of us).

It was a really good day.

Cousins

 Between my husband and I we have 5 nephews and 1 niece.

When we found out about BJ's deployment one of the silver linings was that Sophie would get to spend a year getting to know her family, especially her cousins.

Only 2 her around her age (our niece and 1 nephew), 2 of the older nephews are siblings and used to playing with younger children and our 2 oldest nephews are only children.

I don't point this out cause I have a problem with "only" children, in fact I firmly believe people should have as many children as they want no more no less, I say this because these 2 nephews are older, they don't have a lot in common with my 16 month old daughter, yet they are both so sweet with her.

Its not that I expected either of them to be mean, selfish or particularly impatient with Sophie, they are both really good boys, but I have been surprised by how attentive, playful and kind to my daughter they are.

 BK is at an age when his priorities are hanging with his friends, playing video games, and having Airsoft wars, yet when we are at his house rather then head to his room, or go to a friends, he plays with Sophie. He lets her play with his Ipod and actually holds her. She is crazy about him!

BF is the only other grandchild on his side of the family. There are two 2nd cousins in our pretty tight knit family that are a bit younger then him but up until Sophie he was the only grandchild. Even at his age it wouldn't be abnormal for him to not particularly like her, have a little bit of competition or even hurt feelings about having to share the attention, but no, he is so sweet with her. He gentle and patient and loves to share his old toys with her. When he's comes over, she follows him around and trys to do whatever he does.

All of our nieces and nephews have been wonderful with Sophie, and I'm certain as they spend time together I will have such wonderful tales to share. But I have been so blessed and thankful by how loving these 2 nephews have been with Sophie that I just had to brag a little about them.

Sophie getting to know her cousins is certainly a wonderful gift, them wanting to get to know her is a delight.

Father's Day

I always new that BJ would be an amazing father.

He has always been so great with kids. I used to tell people that he is like Santa Claus, kids just seem to flock to him as though they know that he will get down on their level and play.

Over the years he has loved being an uncle to our 5 nephews and 1 niece, but there is nothing like the sound of a little voice calling YOU daddy.

From the moment Sophia was handed to us, BJ was head over heels in love with her. It was like in the Grinch when his heart grew three sizes, except BJ's was already big to begin with. I thought he might actually burst with love for her and every day after that he fell deeper and deeper in love.

The feeling was mutual.

That first night in the hotel it was daddy who had the touch that got Sophie to fall asleep. It was daddy who made her giggle all the time, and kept her calm on the plane ride home. Once Sophie could pull herself up at the window, she would stand there at 5pm to watch for daddy to come home. When she started walking, she would rush to the stairs to meet him with a big grin and a hug. When he'd leave in the morning she would point our "dadda" in every picture in the house, or just rehearse "dadda" over and over again. She has all the makings of wonderful daddy's girl.

Even now, when she hears the computer ringing she runs to the screen yelling "dadda" all the way. She loves to play "peek a boo" with him. Recently she has started to ask him to pick her up, which as heart breaking as it seems, is so sweet. She just wants to be with her daddy. She doesn't understand that he's so far away.

We are so thankful that though it is certainly not the same, BJ and Sophie can still spend time together over the Internet. He can read to her, and play silly games. He can watch her play, and she can make faces at him. She might not reach his face, but she has started to kiss the screen and it won't be long before her "I love you" sounds like "I love you".

So our Father's Day won't be what we always imagined it would be but it'll still be the best one ever. BJ finally has a little voice that calls him "dadda" and she is crazy about him.

Happy Father's Day babe, we love you so much.

I would Say "Uh huh" all over again

15 years ago today I said, "uh huh"

I was supposed to say "I do" but that's just not what came out. It had nothing to do with cold feet and everything to do with how overwhelmed and overjoyed I was that I was finally going to be his wife.

It had been such a long wait (that seems to be our theme).

We had been together for 5 years. We met when we were 16 and dated for almost a year before he left for the Air Force Academy. We spent the next 4 years long distance, him in Colorado, me in Wisconsin.

As with every "wait", when we started it felt like it would be forever till we could be together, but by the end the time had flown.

God has this way of highlighting the joyful parts and fading the pain into the background.

Also like every "wait" it was so worth the it! Our wedding day was beautiful, but the life that we have made out shines it by far.

We were children when we got married (21) and we had no idea what the years would bring. We've had our share of pain but even through the pain we laughed (BJ has always been able to make me laugh) so even the painful stuff isn't so bad. God highlights the joyful parts and fades the pain to the background.

Once again we find ourselves at the beginning of a "wait". And once again it feels like it will be forever till we are together. Thankfully God is so good to have shown us in the past that once we are on the other side of the "wait" the time will have flown. And when we look back on this year He will have highlighted the joyful parts and the pain will fade.

But for today I am just so thankful that I am still as overwhelmed and overjoyed to be his wife as I was 15 years ago. I would joyfully say "uh huh" all over again.

Sophie and the floaty

So no matter the challenges of moving and getting settled in a new home and into a new life, there is always this little joy bouncing around my home. Its amazing to me how no matter how whinny and tired I am, this little sprite can make me laugh so hard by just being her silly, inquisitive self. How blessed am I that this is my daughter.

If only the weather would warm up again so I could show what the blow up floaty is actually for.

Expectations

I'm not freakishly ridged about much of anything. I tend to be and try to be pretty laid back (at least I think so), but with Sophie I believe she needs a schedule. I know there is plenty of debate about whether schedules are good are bad, but BJ and I decided even before we brought her home, that giving Sophie a routine would help provide some stability and security in her new life. We also thought that having a predictable schedule would give her some consistency (and comfort) when we traveled and of course when we moved (at the time we had no idea we'd be moving so soon).

So throughout our packing, traveling and getting settled we did our best to keep Sophie on her schedule. Like I said before I'm not really ridged about it, we will move her naps a little here and there and if we need to even skip one, but most days we keep to the schedule. Well at least we tried.

For the first few weeks while BJ was in training, Sophie was fairly consistent. The weekend BJ was home all trace of a schedule was out the window (and rightfully so) so BJ could spend as much time as possible with his daughter before he left.

It's now been two weeks since BJ was here and it seems that Sophie is getting further and further away from a schedule! For a few days she slept until almost 9a! But then she was up before 6a and the last few days have been around 7ish. So some days she needs 2 naps, sometimes 1, she always seems a little tired and she's been a bit fussy.

I'm feeling a bit weary. Its not that Sophie isn't on a schedule so much, as it is that there are so many friends and family that want to see us and its impossible to plan anything when I don't know from one day to the other when she'll need a nap (and I refuse to push her to meltdown). I feel like I'm constantly having to explain that I don't know if we can make it, or that we can't stay long, or that though she seems just fine she is still adjusting to having her life turned upside down for the 2nd time in 6 months. I want to see and spend time with our family but right now its more important to me to get Sophie settled it.

On top of that I miss BJ. I miss him so much that I'm pretty sure if it weren't for Sophie I'd still be in bed. That might sound pathetic but I love my husband, and though I know we'll be fine and that we are hardly the only family that has been separated for a year but being apart sucks!

All that said, my daughter is joy and light and I am so crazy in love with her.

Throwing like a Girl

Sophie just learned a new skill. She can now throw a ball...backwards